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Last week we shared Annette Amelia Mandis’ poem, “Time” in which she expressed the contrasting view of time. We asked you to share what time meant to you and the response was overwhelming. This week I’d like to share two more of her poems. Do these resonate with any of you?

My Roller-Coaster Ride Called Life

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I’m woman, accomplishing numerous tasks,
Preferring immediately getting things done,
Juggler, handling multi-tasks,
Only later, stealing fun moments in sun.

Never procrastinating nor deciding to wait,
For things possibly handled today,
Can’t I finally learn, accept fate,
Realizing tomorrow is dawn of new day?

How long can body withstand constant race?
Desiring wiser health decision,
In life, sometimes need about-face,
Carefully weighing choices, deliberate precision.

Realizing my body needs to survive,
Continuous merry-go-round causing fatigue,
Does hope still exist for life to revive?
Calm moments of wonder delightfully intrigue!

 

Precious Time

Life, precious gift,
Hashem bestowed,
All-encompassing,
Mercurial moments.

Not comprehending,
Life-span length,
Each moment, breath,
Priceless treasure.

Parents, siblings,
Sons, daughters,
Husbands, wives,
Caring friends.

Spending time together,
Sharing confidences,
Listening intently,
Truly bonding.

Cherishing time,
Improving choices,
Revitalizing relationships,
Igniting connections.

 

Do you feel as if there’s never enough time to accomplish it all? I received an interesting letter from a young mother who writes: “I feel like I’m constantly on a treadmill with no stop button. Attempting to keep up with life’s demands, never seeming to find enough time for myself. I wear numerous hats, trying to do it all. I can’t please everyone, yet try to in my multitude of roles such as wife, mother, daughter, daughter-in-law, sister, friend, and co-worker. I often feel the need to find the treadmill pause button in order to simply breathe.”

Another letter came from a middle-aged man who also feels he never has enough time. He writes, “During the day, I work full-time as a criminal lawyer. Wrestling with whether I believe that my client is truly innocent or guilty and if I can in good-conscience represent him is vital to me, yet quite time-consuming. After making a decision, a great deal of research is done and then there are the court appearances. I feel like a juggler as I go to daven three times a day, learn at night, attempt to help my wife with the children and some household chores. When can I find time for myself? I also have individual needs.” He wonders whether as we age and retire, life becomes less pressured, providing us with more time.

A letter from a retired grandmother gave this answer. “I taught kindergarten for over twenty-five years,” she wrote, “and retired a couple of years ago. During my teaching years, I constantly felt as if I were an octopus, being stretched by others in eight different directions. Not enjoying saying no, I often succumbed to requests viewing them as demands I couldn’t refuse. However, now that I’ve retired, I’ve begun to realize that the ability to choose how I spend the rest of my life is mine. I can join a senior center, pursue crocheting, join a drama club, take a course, or go to the gym. Some of my friends have become caretakers to ill spouses. Others babysit full-time in order to assist their children who are busy making a parnassa. At the same time, they’re forming a closer relationship with their grandchildren. My retired life is quite busy yet the difference I see is that I’m now able to select my daily activities. Believing I possess the choice of deciding how to spend my time is truly special to me.”

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Dr. Yael Respler is a psychotherapist in private practice who provides marital, dating and family counseling. Dr. Respler also deals with problems relating to marital intimacy. Letters may be emailed to [email protected]. To schedule an appointment, please call 917-751-4887. Dr. Orit Respler-Herman, a child psychologist, co-authors this column and is now in private practice providing complete pychological evaluations as well as child and adolescent therapy. She can be reached at 917-679-1612. Previous columns can be viewed at www.jewishpress.com and archives of Dr. Respler’s radio shows can be found at www.dryaelrespler.com.