Photo Credit: Issam Rimawi / Flash 90
Arab rioters hurling rocks at Israeli soldiers during clashes near Ramallah. (file)

Facing increased criticism from soldiers in the field, both enlisted and reservists, for issuing crazy-making orders and impossible rules of engagement, the IDF has decided to improve things by enhancing the technology available to the men and women in uniform facing Arab rock and Molotov cocktail throwers.

The Central Command, which controls Judea and Samaria, is examining the possibility of integrating a new non-lethal bullet to replace its rubber bullets. The new variety is a 40-millimeter bullet with a sponge tip—a “Nerf” bullet, if you will—giving it the advantage of being safe at close range. Maj. Yuval Yaron, head of weapons and technology for the Central Command, stated that the new bullets are currently undergoing testing at the Chief Medical Officer’s headquarters and are expected to be integrated by the end of the year.

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Of course, the soldiers have not been complaining about their weapons, but about the confusing orders they must follow, orders that read like something produced by a team of commercial attorneys:

Responding on Friday to a highly critical article in Makor Rishon (IDF Soldiers Humiliated by Arab Rioters: We Are Sitting Ducks), the IDF Spokesperson’s Office stated: “The IDF forces in Judea and Samaria are challenged daily by a complex reality requiring professionalism and determination together with judgment. The rules of engagement in Judea and Samaria facilitate an appropriate range of responses to a wide variety of threats faced by IDF forces and they are tested occasionally according to evaluations. It must be stressed that taking immediate action against violators of the public order and popular terror activists does not negate determined and effective action, and at its root lies the understanding that as small a number of injured as possible would help guard the security stability in the region.”

Now go fight for your country, young man…

Then there’s the special piñata suit:

Soldiers of the Central Command have already begun using new protective suits, and they will receive hundreds more in the coming month. The suits, which include a pair of special protective gloves, protect a soldier’s shoulders, chest, back, groin, thighs and calves. They are designed to absorb shocks, stones and clubs.

Yeah! We still can’t do anything against those Arab rioters, but now it’ll hurt less.

Last month, the Central Command’s Fire Formation received dozens of GPS units made by GARMIN, which specializes in satellite navigation devices. The devices are designed for navigation in the field, and they allow users to establish specialized routes. “It is a very user-friendly device which is right now designated for soldiers from special units only,” Maj. Yaron explained.

If you didn’t get what this means, it’s about a squad of soldiers having to escape in a hurry when a crowd of Arabs converges on them from all over and they’re not allowed to engage them—if they open fire, they’ll be investigated and go to jail.

Obviously, it isn’t the soldiers who need a GPS urgently, it’s the IDF brass and the Israeli politicians who’ve set out to destroy the best army in the region.

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10 COMMENTS

  1. Please tell me this is a Purim article.

    The only effective weapon is to publicize that every Israeli bullet, rocket, bomb, landmine and shell contains pork. Muslims are taught that violence against infidels grants them eternal life in Paradise, so even if they are killed they have nothing to lose. But pork is like Kryptonite to them and prevents them from going to Paradise, so they will have something to lose. It's so simple.

    And if the IDF won't do it, let soldiers do it on a private basis.

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