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19 Adar II 5779 -
? Tuesday, March 26, 2019


Oh Felesteen, We Love You So, We Will Burn You Up So The Jews...

O Felesteen, We shall free you from the prison of their wicked acts of farming, through blood and fire! Mostly fire, though. Lots of it.

Sire, Haman’s Lottery For When To Kill The Jews Promotes Gambling

Sire, just because Eilat is considering legalizing gambling, doesn't make it good for Shushan!

What’s Important Is I Don’t IDENTIFY As An anti-Semite

Only the Jewish-controlled media--supported by Jewish money--have the power to spread such falsehoods as my being an antisemite.

Therapist To Help Hamas Men In Collapsed Tunnel Who Feel ‘Trapped’

Feeling "trapped" and "no light at the end of the tunnel" has led to depression among Hamas diggers

UN Blames Israel For Lousy Mobile Reception In Hamas Tunnels

“It would have been more humane to enable the doomed people trapped in tunnels to play, for example, Candy Crush.”

Eclipse Distraction So Successful, Mossad Plans More

“We’re chuffed to bits,” gushed a section chief in uncharacteristic exuberance.

To Get Obama’s Attention, ISIS Renames Self, ‘Global Warming’

ISIS intends to rename itself "Global Warming" in order to provoke US into confronting it seriously.

Maggid Of Mezeritch: Gebrochts An April Fools Prank Gone WILD!

My friends and I were sure that our disciples, who were learned men, would get the joke, that Gebrocht was an April Fools prank and that would be the end of that. But it didn't happen that way.

Palestinians Mull Plans For When No Holocaust Survivors Left To Stab

From the Arab perspective, the future of Holocaust-survivor-stabbing is bleak, and that replacements for it will not carry the same power.

BDS Says Vashti Boycott Of Ahashverosh Feast Their Idea

This is not the first time the BDS movement has claimed victory as the result of a development that actually runs counter to their goals.

Ayatollahs Realize US Would, By Contrast, Veto Any UN Resolution Against Iran

“Obama.’s been angling to abandon Israel since before he took office.”

BDS Protesters Using Banners Made In Jewish Settlements

Signs of the times: BDS signs made beyond "Green Line" BDS is 'black and blue' from 'Blue and White'

Consistent Use Of Correct Hebrew Proves Man Is Foreign Spy

“He was using the right verb form for the third-person plural future,” recalled an agent.

PreOccupied Territory: NGOs Can’t Hear Dying Syrians Over Sound Of How Awesome Hamas Is

“Chemical weapons? No, that couldn’t be right. Obama and Kerry promised Russia would take care of removing Assad’s stockpile.”

AOC: Make Poverty Illegal

“If we want our children safer in school, in the streets, and at home, we need to ban firearms; if we want our children to have enough to eat and a comfortable life, we need to ban poverty.”

Naomi Returns To Bethlehem; Last Time Jew Does So Without Military Escort

Naomi came back to Bethlehem today after 10 years, marking the final time for about three millennia that a Jew will enter the city without need of an armed escort.

Netanyahu Staff Now Using Iranian Nuke CDs As Coasters

“It would be a shame to have so many CDs go to waste. My children’s preschool can only use so many of the things in crafts projects.”

Non-Arab Iran Willing To Fight Israel and the West Down To Very Last Arab

We are fighting a fight of survival. But it’s not our survival that’s at stake. We’ll be fine. Can’t say the same for the Arabs of the region, though.”

Haredim Puzzled By World’s Use Of Sukkah Decorations In December

Sukkah tinsel decorations enjoy a robust market but are invariably manufactured for "another"holiday

Now 40, Islamic Republic Of Iran Secretly Looking Forward To Annual Prostate Exam

“At the annual checkup Iran has asked numerous times what the procedure entails, and never hesitates to delve into every detail.”

Erdogan Wouldn’t Let Elders Of Zion Plan His Fake Coup

“For a coup to be believable, you need the armed forces to be behind it, not just a few units with some others along for the ride.”

Rabbinate To Charge Non-Kosher Restaurants For Non-Kosher Certification

Establishments pursuing a more elite non-kosher clientele will also enjoy more expensive options such as certification that the establishment uses or serves wine consecrated or offered to idolatry.

CNN Offers $10K Reward For Positive Stories Of Islamists

CNN issued the offer in keeping with its policy of offsetting every negative report about Islamists

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